Smokers’ corner - Nicorette Inhalator

I’m living above a pub at the minute, which essentially means there are always people stood outside my house smoking.

However, so far I have absolutely tanned my Nicorette Inhalator instead. Good job that it isn’t as bad for me. It does get a few funny looks in the office but so far it has been helpful - completing quashing any want for a cigarette.

It's also quite confusing. There is no mention of how many cartridges you’re meant to use, so I’m not sure whether or not I’m over-dosing on the nicotine tampon.

The big test will come tonight. My mate has split up with his girlfriend so I’m taking him out to get drunk and say inappropriate things to girls. Alcohol has always been the downfall in my previous attempts to quit smoking. Hopefully tonight will be different.

I guess the smoking oracle was right. About six hours after talking to him and now in a slightly inebriated state, I gave into temptation and had a cigarette. This all came about after hours of torment from colleagues who smoked.

Got a pretty bad hangover today, however I managed to go out and have a few beers without having a cigarette. This did at some points involve me looking a bit special with my Nicorette Inhalator, but if it means I’ve survived three days of this challenge I don’t care.

I’m starting to feel quite good about quitting. The only downside has been that my body has decided it’s time to start getting all of the tar out of my system. I’ve started coughing up bits of ‘lung butter’.

Today I rang a non-smoking helpline to see if they could offer any advice. I opted to phone UK Charity ‘Quit’.

I rang in the early afternoon and was answered by a male voice which sounded like it regularly smokes 80 fags a day.

“Hello?”

“Hello, I’ve just had a look on your website and I’m ringing to get some advice on quitting.”

I strained to listen to the reply from the man. His voice was so croaky and quiet, that he was difficult to hear. After a long pause he said: “Help in quitting what?” I paused and thought long and hard about my answer before replying.

“Erm, just smoking mate.”

This seemed to bring the man to life. “Oh OK then” he said, “how many do you smoke a day?”

“About eight.”

“Do you have friends that smoke?”

“Yes.”

“Do you have friends that don’t smoke?”

“Yes.”

“Well I suggest for the time being you ignore the friends that smoke and just see the ones that do.”

It wasn’t really the life-changing advice I was expecting. There was now an awkward silence as the man paused to allow me time to take in the utter wisdom that he had just delivered to me over the phone.

After finally managing to digest this nugget of information, I looked to break the silence.

“Brilliant, anything else?”

“No sorry mate, I don’t really know enough about you and your lifestyle to give you any more advice” and with that, the receptor went dead and the man with the crokey voice had gone.

It wasn’t the most brilliant advice but it was advice none the less. After all this man, despite sounding like he was a chain smoker, was a master in helping young guns like myself quit. Unfortunately his advice causes me some concern. I’m meant to be going out again tonight with two of my mates. One of them smokes but the other doesn’t. If I’m to follow the smoking oracle’s advice I might have to spend all night ignoring Scott. This may cause irreversible damage to our friendship. Hmmm.

I guess the smoking oracle was right. About six hours after talking to him I gave into temptation and had a cigarette. This all came about after hours of torment from colleagues who smoked. Despite feeling bad about this cigarette, I am also quite pleased I had it. This is because all of the other times I have failed, a cheeky drunken cigarette, like this one has been the catalyst to re-starting completely and that thankfully hasn't been the case this time.

I've decided to stop using the Nicorette Inhalator now as I’ve found that using it only makes me want to have cigarettes more. Now I'm not smoking that, I'm thinking about smoking real cigarettes less.I've also started being more healthy generally which is helping quite a lot. Over the last few days, I've been jogging twice.

Still not smoked since Friday and now I’ve been given a book to read by a friend. 'The Easy Way To Stop Smoking' by Allen Carr (not that one) is meant to be the best reading guide for anyone who is trying to quit, so I'm going to give that a ganders next week and see if it helps.